I had a dream about the movie incident. I woke with my heart pounding and sweaty palms as if I'd actually been in a confrontation.
I keep hoping the theater was dark enough that Marlene didn't see me sink down in my seat with my eyes just peeking out over my popcorn. I keep imaging it was crowded enough that she didn't suspect I was pretending. I hung around looking for something in the seat after the movie, so I wouldn't have to file out next to her. I stayed far enough back to keep a few people between us until the mob from our theater could mix with a few others in the main lobby.
I mumbled something about my keys, but I could tell by her look she didn't believe me. There isn't a place dark enough or crowded enough to hide the fact that I am a coward and we both know it. It was so stupid really, I've known Marlene for years. She wouldn't have expected me to actually DO anything. But how can she forgive me for something as pathetic as pretending not to know her. How can I forgive myself?
I know that big fat slob has no idea what his juvenile outburst cost. But in his defense, how was he to know the girl with the loud laugh was the only friend of a pusillanimous pig. Well, at least she was my friend. Probably not anymore if she is smart anyway.
I think I will try and go back to sleep. I like the other ending better.
Diary entry: July 4, 2 am. Josie Ambrose
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