Friday, June 10, 2011

From the Mom

Okay, you know you are an official blogger slacker when your computer doesn't finish your address for you when you type it in. Sorry!

As a mother of five, I know enough to know one thing. I am not an expert!

I have also found that other mothers are the best source of food for thought and tricks of the trade. And so I offer the following tid bits that I tell myself, or my kids, on a regular basis:

1. When arguing with a five year old (or an eleven year old for that matter), it is helpful to remember, I am the adult.

2. Fair does not mean equal. It would be unfair to treat different human beings with different strengths and weaknesses the same. Plus, Life ain't fair, so get used to it now.

3. During a melt down remember: Some kids require food, some require sleep, some require a spanking to get it together.

4. Kids fight. Just do it outside, so I don't have to listen to it.

5. Whining is easier to ignore with wine.

6. As my mother often tells me, "You will miss this stage, you WILL!"

7. What are my priorities? Does this serve them? No, we aren't going to Disney Land.

8. Before speaking ask: "Is it necessary? Is it kind?" (kind does not have to be sweet)

9. I heard your question and I gave you an answer. No is an answer. Quit asking!

10. I will always love you, whether or not I like you depends on you.

11. I know you love me, you don't have to like me right now.

12. You can have X when you are the mom.

13. I feel your pain, would you believe when I was your age, I was the only kid in the world who didn't have X either?

14. We don't have to go to church, we GET to go to church!

And last but not least:

15. Go ask your dad!